Why Is There So Much Stigma Around Adoption?

By Conner Sura

Throughout history adoption has been a taboo topic in society. Although the topic became more widely accepted over centuries. Birth mothers started to see adoption as a viable option to give their child the best life possible. Adoption still hosts a negative stigma. Adoption became a political talking point-scaring away birth mothers and potential adoptee couples. Even though stigma around adoption shrinks, many more families start to explore different adoption agencies to start a family. The stigma around adoption still persists scaring birth mothers and potential families away.

Adoption Choices of Colorado knows how intimidating the adoption process can be. We are here to help you if you are considering to give your baby up for adoption. We are the number one adoption agency across Colorado. Here are some reasons why society might view adoption to be taboo.

A Mother Who Gives Up Her Child Doesn’t Love Them Or Is Too Lazy To Take Care Of Them

A common adoption stigma surrounding adoption is the birth mother being weak or too lazy to take care of the child. Giving up a child for adoption is not being weak or lazy. Giving up a child for adoption is an incredibly painful and difficult thing to do. While some people might think that a mother surrendering her child to adoption is lazy, and an easy way to escape her unplanned pregnancy. Giving up a child is one of the most painful things a birth mother can do. The decision is not made lightly.

Every mother wants the best for her child and sometimes for whatever reason a mother can’t provide the perfect life she wants for her child. She makes the difficult choice of giving up her child for adoption. She believes that adoption will give her child the best possible life they can have.

Birth Mothers Don’t Grieve For Their Child

Connecting to the previous myth. Adoption can be an emotionally taxing and traumatic experience for birth mothers. Many birth mothers grieve the loss of their children. Adoption isn’t easy. Birth mothers who do put their child up for adoption believe it is a necessity. Adoption is an incredibly painful process for them.

Adoption Choices of Colorado can help grieving birth mothers connect to support groups and therapists.

Adopted Children Have Problems

Watching a movie, reading a book, or even playing a game you might’ve heard this joke after a character does something ridiculous: “Well he’s adopted.” The joke perpetuates a common fallacy of adopted children growing up to have problems. Of course, some adopted children can present behavioral challenges, no studies show that adoptees have a higher rate of behavior problems. 

Birth Mothers Won’t See Their Children Again After Adoption

Tying into the previous misconception. If a birth mother decides to pursue open adoption, she might be able to see her child. Open adoption allows birth mothers to take part in their child’s lives post-adoption. This includes adoption information, visits, calls, and open contact between the birth mother and the adoptee’s family.

Yet, older children and teens tend to benefit from open adoption. Open adoption helps older children maintain a level of self-identity, better adjusting the child to the new change.

Although open adoption can help a child better develop emotionally. Open adoption could lead to the risk of conflict between the two parent groups. However, open adoption does not mean shared parenting. The birth mother will still relinquish all her parental rights and responsibilities.

Another option, semi-open adoption allows for both groups to communicate with each other through adoption professionals. Semi-open adoption protects both groups’ identification information and allows for the child to connect with their birth family.

All Adoptees Usually Come From Teenagers, And The Uneducated

A stereotype often used to criticize birth mothers is that they all come from uneducated backgrounds, or are teenagers. One size does not fit all. Birth mothers come from all walks of life, and many do not give up their child for a single purpose. Things can happen that can cause a birth mother to give her child up. A birth mother could be raising other children and can not support another. Maybe she is in a situation with domestic abuse, or she is going through a mental health crisis. limiting the reason why a birth mother gives up her child to three vague categories is not fair. Of course, some birth mothers might be teenagers, and come from poorer backgrounds. This only applies to a small fraction of all birth mothers.

Your Real Choice for Colorado Adoption

Although there are still stigmas about adoption and the people can be harsh. Remind people that birth mothers are human and go through a lot of pain of putting their child up for adoption. If you are a birth mother who is wondering how to give up your baby for adoption or are someone interested in adoption. Adoption Choices of Colorado can help you understand your real choice for your adoption plans. Please, Call us:  303-670-4673 (HOPE), text us: 720-371-1099, or email us; we are here to support you.


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