The Strength and Courage of Giving Your Child Up for Adoption

By: Isabelle Bryan

For a birth mother, placing your child for adoption can be a difficult and emotional process. Perhaps you want the child but know you can’t keep them. Or maybe you knew adoption was the only option from the moment you discovered you were pregnant. Either way, it is a process that takes time and consideration. 

Adoption Choices of Colorado is here to help with that. Our counselors and adoption specialists will inform you of all your options and help you to make informed choices. And remember—doing your best to make the right decisions is only part of the adoption process in Colorado. You’ll also have to deal with the potential emotional fallout and take the time to heal once it’s over.

The Difficulty of Choosing Child Adoption

Deciding how to give your baby up for adoption isn’t the first step in the adoption process. The actual first step is making the decision to place your baby for adoption in the first place. Maybe you’re unhoused or financially insecure and can’t support a child. Perhaps it’s an unplanned pregnancy and you don’t have the ability to keep your baby. Or you may have a family already, but one that can’t support new additions. In any case, save for unwanted pregnancies, it can be difficult to accept that you can’t keep your child. 

Feelings of grief, loss, and guilt are all perfectly natural. Even if it’s better for you and the baby that they’re placed for adoption, it doesn’t necessarily make it easier. The adoption process may help you come to terms with some of it. It may even help you acknowledge that you are doing your best to secure a bright future for your child. But months or even years down the line, you may still grieve your decision. You may even wish, if your situation changes or improves, that you had kept the baby. And, should you choose an open or semi-open adoption, you may be confronted with milestones you aren’t wholly part of. 

Adoption can be a difficult and emotional decision, and an important part of choosing adoption is considering what’s best. Not just for your child, but also for you. 

Choosing child adoption as a birth mother takes strength. Not only are you deciding to carry to term, but you are choosing to give up your child. Even if you’re trying to give them a better life, that doesn’t necessarily make it an easier decision. But sometimes, creating a better life for the both of you means letting them go.

The Strength of Choosing Adoption in Colorado

To some, choosing to place a baby for adoption may seem like the birth mother giving up. Perhaps you’ve even heard that so often that you believe it. But the truth is, choosing adoption can be its own form of love—even if the pregnancy is unwanted. Keeping the baby in an environment that might not be conducive to their well-being may only serve to hurt them. Choosing to place your child for adoption is still taking care of them, even though you’re giving them up. It takes an enormous amount of strength and love to decide that your child’s best life is not with you. 

Choosing adoption also doesn’t mean that you’ll never get the chance to see your child again. For birth mothers who choose an open or semi-open adoption, you can still see your child grow up. And hopefully, it means you’ll get the chance to see that you made the right decision.

Child Adoption Benefits Children and Adoptive Families

Placing your child for adoption through one of our adoption agencies in Colorado is an act of great love. You’re acknowledging that the best place for your child is not with you but with someone else. And working with our Colorado adoption agency means that you’ll get to personally choose someone else. Our adoption specialists can help you determine any criteria you have for an adoptive family and sort through prospective parents. Then, you’ll get the chance to meet the adoptive family of your choice to form a more personal opinion. Additionally, our home studies and supervision after placement will help to determine that your child is safe and cared for. 

But choosing adoption doesn’t only benefit your child. It also benefits the adoptive family. Perhaps the adoptive parents can’t have children of their own, whether due to infertility or because they’re a same-sex couple. Perhaps it’s a single parent looking to start a family on their own terms. Whatever the case, adoption allows them a chance they may not have had otherwise. 

Getting Support During the Adoption Process

Our adoption agencies in Colorado provide several adoption services, including financial assistance for eligible birth mothers, professional adoption specialists, and counseling. Not only do we have trained counselors waiting to assist you, but we also offer a birth mother support group. Both are of no cost to you, so you never have to worry about affording any support you may need. 

Support is an important part of keeping yourself mentally healthy. After adoption, it may be even more important. Handling everything on your own may be more harmful than it is helpful. No matter the struggle, you can talk through it with a trained counselor or the birth mother support group. Every birth mother in the group has gone—or is going—through their own adoption. As such, they can likely empathize with whatever you’re feeling. Additionally, allowing yourself to connect and share stories of your emotional struggles may help you to begin healing.

Engaging in Self-Care After Your Colorado Adoption

Emotional support isn’t the only way to care for yourself during and after placing your child for adoption. You also have to care for yourself physically. Some ways to do this include:

  • Eating healthy, including drinking lots of water. The good news is, unlike nursing mothers, you may be able to get back to drinking coffee and alcohol immediately.
  • Exercising regularly. Perhaps don’t strain yourself too much right after the delivery, but take time to engage in physical activity.
  • Getting out into nature. Let yourself breathe and stop focusing on your hurts and worries, however briefly. Consider practicing yoga, meditation, or mindful breathing outdoors for added stress relief.
  • Getting a good night’s sleep.
  • Taking the time to engage in a hobby, even if it’s only for a little while each day.

Choosing Adoption Choices of Colorado

Choosing child adoption in Colorado can be an incredibly difficult decision. You may even question your choice during and after the adoption process. But remember that you’re trying to give your child the best life you can. And sometimes, letting them go is the best decision for you and your child, no matter how difficult it is.

As a licensed, private adoption center, Adoption Choices of Colorado is here to help every step of the way. You’ll never have to worry about making decisions alone, being unhoused, or lacking financial or emotional support. Our services are at your disposal throughout your pregnancy and beyond. If you would like to learn more about your options, contact Adoption Choices of Colorado by email, phone, or text.

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