The Role A Birth Father Plays In Adoption

By Anabel Sierra 

When people think about “adoption,” some may believe it only surrounds the birth mother. However, where there is a birth mother, there is also a birth father. As far as Adoption Choices of Colorado is concerned, birth fathers have just as much responsibility as the mothers. As the birth father, you have just as much choice and power in the adoption process. By coming to us, we will assist you both in what you need to know about adoption. 

Your Rights As The Birth Father 

In the state of Colorado, it is important to know that your child cannot be adopted without your legal consent. If you wish to go through the process with the mother, you are allowed to do so! You have a right to know that she is developing a plan, what method, and what family is being chosen. Regardless of marital status, you can still be presumed as the birth father if you are involved with the birth mother. However, a paternity test is required to validate your parenthood fully. However, if the birth father is not known, you may be able to waive legal consent.  While the legalities of this may sound confusing and complicated, you do not need to worry. We have dedicated and experienced adoption counselors to help guide you through it all. 

Birth Fathers And Choosing Adoption Methods 

As the birth parent, you may be wondering what the options are for adoption methods. There are three methods to choose from: open, semi-open, and closed.

  • Open adoption is when both birth parents have full access to the adoptive family before, during, and after the placement. This option is the most common choice and where all questions and concerns can be addressed. Post-placement communication is allowed and birth parents are able to be involved in the child’s life from afar. This option can help build and strengthen the relationships between all parties.
  • Semi-open adoption is when communication between birth and adoptive parents is still possible but through a third party. This allows a bit more privacy and all concerns can still be addressed. Communication post-placement is still allowed but limited to occasional photos rather than a constant stream of communication. 
  • Closed adoption is for when our birth parents wish to have the most privacy. This option isn’t as common of a choice, but it is respected nonetheless. No communication will be held between the birth and adoptive parents and we will take care of the whole process. We understand that certain situations may call for this option and all of your information will be confidential. 

Financial Support During Adoption

If you are considering adoption, you may be wondering what your financial responsibility may be. Everyone’s financial situation is different, and we are very understanding of this. So, whatever is not being covered by the mother’s health insurance, the adoptive family can cover it. If you do not have any insurance, we will work with you both to form a financial support plan. We want to assure you that it is okay to not be financially prepared for a baby. You are not a failure of a father or man because of it. That is why we make sure that the adoptive families are financially stable and able to cover costs if needed. 

Emotional Support During Adoption 

With adoption Colorado Springs, we encourage fathers to be vulnerable in one of our support groups or therapy sessions. As a part of your adoption plan, you and the birth mother are able to use our facilities. Coping with giving your baby up for adoption has no timeline and you are able to partake as long as needed. Complex feelings such as grief, fear, and anxiety may come up and these are very normal to experience.

As important as it is to take care of your emotional well-being, it’s also important to care for the birth mother. As the birth father, you should also be making sure that the mother feels heard throughout the process. Sitting down and talking about your mutual fears and concerns shows that neither of you are alone. After discussing, it’s a good idea to also make sure that the mother feels comforted as the months go on. By providing an emotionally safe space, you both ensure that the pregnancy will be as smooth as possible. 

Choosing Adoption Is Choosing Peace 

Dealing with an unplanned pregnancy with the birth father can be a stressful time, but it doesn’t need to be. By putting your child up for adoption doesn’t always mean you’re giving up. What it does mean, though, is that you are providing a better life for your child. By working with us, you will be able to find peace and happiness. Giving up your baby for adoption is a tough process and if you change your mind, that’s okay! You, as the birth parent, are able to stop the process at any point. If you wish to learn more, don’t hesitate to call or come to one of our adoption centers in Colorado. We’re ready to help. 

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