Stop Saying You’re “Giving Up” Your Child For Adoption
Language is important. It’s how we understand why we think what we do, and how we feel about it. As a birth mother, considering placing your baby for adoption may make you feel defeated. It’s an incredibly hard thing to go through, but it is not something to be ashamed of. You need to be conscious of the language that you use when you talk to yourself about your choices, and when you talk with others about them. Unfortunately, being a birth mother is often associated with this idea of “giving up.”
Adoption Choices of Colorado wants you to separate from this phrasing immediately. You are not giving up. You are placing your child into a loving family where he or she will receive a better chance at life.
Placing Your Child in a New Life
Maybe you’re at a point in your life where you’re not ready to be a mother. Maybe you never wanted to be a mother in the first place. Both positions are perfectly valid. However, your life is no longer the only one you have to consider. The wellbeing of your child falls directly in your ability to give them love and care. If that ability is compromised somehow, you may consider placing them for adoption. There are many families who are desperately longing to raise and parent your child.
Choosing adoption and finding an adoptive family is not “giving up” your child for adoption. It is providing your son or daughter with the stability they deserve, and a loving adoptive family who’s ready to embrace them.
Placing Your Child with a Loving Family
Because many hopeful adoptive parents are not able to conceive children on their own, adoption is a wonderful way for those couples and individuals to become parents and start a family of their own. If you are a birth mother, this should be something that you look for when you’re placing your child for adoption. You are giving this family a wonderful gift, and they will be eternally grateful to you for that.
Also, placing your child with an adoptive family does not mean that you’ll never see him or her again. Adoption Choices of Colorado advocates for open adoptions, and our prospective adoptive families are willing to agree to that as well. You may receive letters, pictures or have visits and phone calls. As a birth mother, you are not the primary parental figure, but you get to watch your child grow up into a happy and healthy adult.
Placing Yourself in A Better Position for the Future
If you are in a position where you are struggling financially or with your living situation, Adoption Choices of Colorado is more than willing to help you. We can help you find temporary housing for the duration of your pregnancy. We are also willing to pay your rent and other court-approved expenses up to six weeks after delivery. It is important to us that you feel safe and have a stable environment until you give birth. This can greatly relieve stress and get you through the first portion of your adoption journey.
With our adoption agency, because you have to worry about your basic needs first and foremost, you will be able to apply for jobs and other housing arrangements post birth. This will help put you into a better and more stable position for your future.
Say You’re “Placing Your Child for Adoption” Instead
When you say that you are placing your child for adoption, you immediately feel more empowered. Like you in control and have an important role in choosing who will raise him or her and what their future will look like. This is exactly why we want you to stop saying that you’re “giving up” your child for adoption. There is too much negativity, guilt and shame associated with that concept — none of which applies to you!
Adoption isn’t a sign of defeat or weakness. It’s a labor of love. We want to make sure that you believe that and feel that way each time you think about choosing adoption for your child.
If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy and want to learn more about your adoption options, contact Adoption Choices of Colorado by email, phone, or text: Email Us, Text us: 720-371-1099, Call us: 303-670-4673 (HOPE). If you are hoping to adopt, please contact us here.
Meet the Author: Katherine Burns is a journalism student at Loyola University Maryland with plans to pursue a career in the news and magazine industries. With over three years of experience writing for the Greyhound Newspaper at Loyola, Katherine specializes in Op-eds. However, she has recently branched out to cover a variety of topics, including education and sports journalism. She also has ample experience with travel blogging.
Katherine has conducted a variety of interviews in her time at Loyola and has displayed her stories through differing forms of media. In addition to her studies at Loyola, Katherine spent the fall of 2019 studying communications at the American University of Paris.To learn more about Katherine, be sure to check her out on social media.
Stephanie joined the Adoption Choices family in 2014 as the Child Placement Supervisor. Her love for adoption began in first grade when she made friends with twins adopted from Vietnam. Her heart grew strong over the years for adopted children and ultimately led her to graduate school where she continued her focus to her dream of working in the adoption field. Stephanie earned a Master of Social Work degree from the University of Denver in 2001. Over the past 15 years, Stephanie has worked as a pregnancy counselor and as an adoptive parent counselor for foster care, international adoption and domestic adoption, writing hundreds of home studies for families, and helping build their forever families. Stephanie is married and has three boys ages 12, 9, and 5. Together with her family she enjoys riding bike, playing games, watching her three sons compete in their various sporting and musical activities and go on vacations.
Christy Ikeler, is our Executive Director and Birth Parent Director. Christy has been with Adoption Choices Team for 18 years, since opening the doors in 2002! Christy has a true passion for what she does and her true love is working with and helping each birth parent. Whether she is up all night on the phone talking with them, taking them to doctors appointments, out for their favorite treat, providing counseling or at the hospital during labor and delivery, Christy is very involved every step of the way. She has a contagious laugh and a spunky personality that our birth moms all can bond with and relate to. As an adoptive parent herself, adoption holds a very special place in her heart and she can relate on every level with both birth parents and adoptive parents. In her free time Christy loves spending time with her daughter, gardening, baking and taking vacations with her family. Christy is an excellent leader for our team at Adoption Choices and is truly one of a kind!! As Executive Director, Christy spends time with the staff, birth parents and adoptive families in order to ensure that the agency is running smoothly. She has placed a huge emphasis on community outreach and programs for birth parents. Christy loves the opportunity to lead the agency into a brighter future.
Ms. Mackenzie has built a successful counseling career over the past 20 years, supporting mothers and families, people of all ages and genders, students, community professionals and fellow clinicians. Liv values a diverse professional focus, including the entrepreneurial life of a sole proprietor, the evaluative process of certifying foster/adoptive homes, the insightful and mindful one-on-one one work with enthusiastic clients, and serving as an advocate for underserved populations. Liv is a Licensed Professional Counselor and holds a BA in Pre-Law and Economics from American University, an MA in Counseling from Adams University and a certificate in Human Resource Management from Villanova University. Away from work you will find Liv spending time in nature, biking to the farmer’s market and adventuring with her family.
Catherine A. Madsen, joined the Adoption Choices family as legal counsel in 2013. Catherine is responsible for providing legal guidance to the Agency, training and updating staff on developments in adoption law and legislation, and program development. Catherine
Virginia Frank is an adoption attorney accredited since 1991 with the American Academy of Adoption Attorneys. Ms. Frank is a leader in the field of private adoption and has completed over 4,000 adoptions in her career. Ms. Frank has a law degree from Oklahoma City University and a BA in both Political Science and Communications from the University of Oklahoma.
Cassidie has been with Adoption Choices since 2015, she has her bachelors in Interdisciplinary Affairs with concentrations in both Sociology and Business Management. Cassidie has additional training in Victim Advocacy, foster care and has been working in women’s services for over 10 years. Cassidie has always had a heart for adoption and it was her career dream to work in adoption. She started off doing volunteer work for advocacy programs, adoption organizations and worked in High Risk Maternal Fetal Medicine through the University of Colorado Hospital and Children’s Hospital of Colorado. Cassidie is also blessed to have personally experienced an adoption of her own in 2012, completing her family of five! Cassidie loves what she does as a case worker from initial phone calls, meetings, doctor appointments, interaction with the adoptive families to delivery and counseling. Cassidie has a passion for those in need and strives to help make a difference in the lives of the people she meets. She is a firm believer in being kind, compassionate and open minded in all situations. “Unless you’ve walked in their shoes, there’s no place for judgment. A kind word or compliment can go a long way!” The bittersweet moments in adoption reminds Cassidie each and every time, why she loves what she does!