5 Misconceptions About Colorado Birth Mothers

By Nicole Hatton

As a birth mother, you may be experiencing a mix of emotions while thinking about your next steps. Deciding what you should do with your baby can be extremely difficult, especially when facing judgments from others. However, if you do not wish to parent, that is completely OK. You’re probably considering adoption and thinking about how to make an adoption plan. Facing an unplanned pregnancy can seem scary, but the adoption process is less overwhelming with adoption agencies such as Adoption Choices of Colorado at your side. Here are 5 misconceptions about Colorado birth mothers and what you can do next!

1. Birth Mothers Are Selfish For Giving Their Child Up For Adoption

Making the decision to become a parent is one that requires much thought and time. Choosing to focus on yourself instead of caring for a baby as well is not selfish. Many birth mothers feel guilty due to conflicting emotions and stereotypes. The truth is, adoption may be the best choice for both the mother and baby. Sometimes, your child may develop or thrive quicker without you as their parent. If that is the case, you shouldn’t feel pressured to take on the responsibility and stress of being a parent. The last thing you should feel is ashamed for seeking out how to give your baby up for adoption. Making this decision in the best interest of your child shows that you are considerate, caring, and loving.

2. Birth Mothers Lose Connection With Their Adopted Child

If you still want to be a part of your child’s life, then you can keep in contact with them! A common misconception in American adoptions is that birth mothers never want to see their child again. However, there are a few different adoption options that you can do. Some birth mothers opt for a closed adoption, but it’s your decision to do that or not. You can do a closed, open, or semi-open adoption. 

Many think that the child will resent the birth mother for giving them up, but this isn’t always the case. Birth mothers choose adoption for different reasons. It doesn’t mean that you have to cut ties if you don’t want to. Having some kind of ongoing contact can help you learn how to support your child or connect with them. In fact, you can also share reasons for choosing adoption for your baby if you would like. You can exchange letters, photos, and stories with the adoptive family. Even if you want to have a closed adoption, there are still numerous adoption agencies in Colorado you can trust.

3. Birth Mothers Are Always Teenagers

Although teenagers can become pregnant and don’t want the baby, that doesn’t mean older women can’t be in the same situation. Birth mothers come from a variety of different backgrounds and ages. You can be single, married, divorced, dating, or have other circumstances. Just because some teenage girls seek adoption options after an unplanned pregnancy, that doesn’t mean most birth mothers are teenage girls. Every woman embarks on their own adoption journey and will have their personal reasons for choosing adoption. Some may choose adoption for financial reasons, educational/career goals, or simply have second thoughts or other personal matters.

4. Choosing Adoption Is An Easy Decision

Adoption is an important decision that becomes final after making the call to do so. It’s not simply saying, “I’ll just have an adoption for my baby because I can’t have it,” and be done. Thinking about your adoption plan, adoptive family, child’s life, staying connected or not, parenting, and other concerns are a lot to take in. Additionally, it’s valid to experience a mix of emotions such as grief, loss, regret, confusion, and more. Pregnant women may also develop a relationship with their baby before giving birth, which can make adoption even more difficult.

5. Birth Mothers Have to Go Through This Alone

You are never alone. Even if you don’t have a network of close family and friends, you have support with adoption in Colorado. You can receive free counseling from Adoption Choices of Colorado before, during, and after giving birth. The birth father can also receive free counseling. Additionally, you can join a support group with Adoption Choices of Colorado. These groups are here for you to discuss your feelings, experiences and support one another after placement. It does not matter how late ago you delivered your baby. You can join a support group at any time! Adoption Choices of Colorado also has adoption resources on a wide variety of topics to help you.

What To Do After Placement

Now that you have a better understanding of misconceptions surrounding birth mothers, it’s essential to reject these stereotypes or judgments. Remember that you are not the negative assumptions that others may make about you. Give yourself some time to feel your emotions and process your thoughts. Take care of yourself, and know that there is plenty of help available from adoption agencies in Colorado. If you haven’t told the birth father yet, agencies like Adoption Choices of Colorado can help you. If the birth father already knows, consider having a discussion with him about what you want to do. Don’t hesitate to call, text, or look into different adoption resources. American adoptions don’t have to be as scary or daunting with us at your side. Know that everything will turn out alright. You, the birth father, and your baby will be supported every step of the way. 

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