How Is A Surrogacy Pregnancy Different Than A Personal Pregnancy?
If you want to become a surrogate, you’re probably wondering if the pregnancy will be different than what you’ve previously experienced. In many ways, surrogacy pregnancies are similar to personal pregnancies. After all, it’s still a pregnancy. You’ll still have doctor visits, morning sickness, a growing baby inside you, and strangers wanting to touch your stomach. Your surrogacy pregnancy should be relatively similar to previous pregnancies you’ve experienced. However, outside of the pregnancy experience itself, there are quite a few differences.
If you’re considering becoming a surrogate in Colorado, this is a great place to start. Adoption and Surrogacy Choices of Colorado is here to help you navigate the surrogacy process and put you at ease throughout the entire journey. Being completely new to surrogacy can be scary and confusing, but we’re here for you. Our compassionate experts are always available to answer any questions and calm all of your concerns.
So you’ve already experienced personal pregnancy, what are the real differences between that and a surrogacy pregnancy?
If you or someone you know is interested in becoming a surrogate, please call or text us at 303-670-4673 (HOPE) or visit us at Adoption and Surrogacy Choices of Colorado.
What Will the Surrogacy Process Look Like For Me as a Surrogate?
- The Pre-Pregnancy Process
In your previous pregnancy or pregnancies, you may not have carefully planned out getting pregnant. The pre-pregnancy process is extremely important in surrogacy pregnancy and lays the foundation work for the surrogacy journey. Aside from the pre-screenings, qualifying, background checks, etc., you have to make sure you’re ready to complete the surrogacy journey. Surrogacy is not a quick thing and requires a real commitment. You will also need to be comfortable communicating and being open with the intended parents. After all, surrogacy is altruistic in a lot of ways. You are becoming a surrogate to help a couple start or grow their family. Understand and be comfortable with your reasons for becoming a surrogate before diving in.
- In Vitro Fertilization (IVF)
Probably the biggest difference in personal and surrogate pregnancy is the use of IVF. The IVF process starts well in advance with medications, injections, and doctor’s appointments prior to the embryo transfer.
You Won’t Be Related to the Baby You’re Carrying
Fertilization happens with eggs that do not belong to the surrogate, so the surrogate mother has no genetic connection to the baby. Many families will use eggs and sperm of their own to be implanted in the surrogate, but sperm or egg donors are also used. It’s almost unheard of for surrogates to use their own eggs since having shared genes can complicate things immensely between the surrogate and intended parents. Even though the surrogate isn’t related to the baby, this doesn’t seem to affect the surrogate. If you’re concerned that this might be uncomfortable for you, talk with your surrogate agency or previous surrogates for some insight.
You’re Pregnancy is for Someone Else
Unlike previous pregnancies, this one is intended for someone else, and you won’t be bringing the baby home. You’ve given so much time and effort to bring the joy of a little life to an intended family. Surrogacy is one of the most selfless acts and takes a lot of internal strength to make that decision. The intended family brings you the ingredients, you put everything together, bake it, and return the combined elements as a perfect little bun.
The Mental Differences and Your Emotional Experience throughout the Surrogacy Process
As you might assume, the emotional experience of being a surrogate mother is completely different from preparing to give birth to your own child. Since after you give birth, there’s no wheeling out of the hospital with a baby in your arms. There’s no decorating a nursery, sleepless nights, or breastfeeding. Your postpartum time will be spent healing and moving forward. In many ways, surrogacy pregnancies are easier to heal mentally from than something like adoption. Since you’re acting as the growth vessel for the intended family’s baby, you might find it easy to disconnect yourself. Many surrogates say the mental healing process after giving birth isn’t as bad as they thought. Compared to the hormone-driven roller coaster of emotions you’ll experience during pregnancy, postpartum may seem like a cakewalk.
That doesn’t mean you won’t experience a lot of sadness or conflicting emotions. This is why it’s critical to take advantage of the postpartum counseling your Colorado surrogacy agency provides.
Teamwork Makes the Dream Work in Surrogacy
It takes a village of experts to make surrogacy happen. Alongside your own support system and surrogacy agency, there’s also IVF specialists, reproductive endocrinologist, and a whole team of other experts making the surrogacy process run smoothly. You’ll encounter a lot of people you probably didn’t have for your personal pregnancy and may recruit some you didn’t use before. Many surrogates and intended families find that having a doula makes surrogacy even smoother and enjoyable for everyone, especially if it’s your first surrogacy experience. Be open to all the help that’s being offered to you.
Are You Ready for Surrogacy?
Surrogacy can be a long and challenging journey, which is why it’s not for everyone. When you become a surrogate, you’ll understand why the surrogacy process is the way it is and why a previous personal pregnancy is necessary. Surrogates are truly special and can be hard to come by. Since the qualifications can be strict and the process is lengthy, not many join the elite group that has successfully been through the surrogacy process. It’s true, surrogacy is quite different from personal pregnancy, but it can be arguably more fulfilling.
If you are interested in learning more about your gestational surrogacy options, contact Adoption and Surrogacy Choices of Colorado by email, phone, or text: Email Us, Text us: 720-371-1099, Call us: 303-670-4673 (HOPE). If you are hoping to adopt, please contact us here.
Meet the Author: Michelle Brugioni is a practiced, well-versed college-educated writer and avid coffee drinker. She has ten years of experience as a freelance writer and has written for an alarmingly wide range of clients and publications. She has written on topics like: life science, biopharmaceutical company acquisitions, dealing with anxiety, and creative drinking games.
As a fearless writer and masterful researcher, each time Michelle is approached with the question, “Can you write this?” she responds confidently with, “When do you need it?”
Stephanie joined the Adoption Choices family in 2014 as the Child Placement Supervisor. Her love for adoption began in first grade when she made friends with twins adopted from Vietnam. Her heart grew strong over the years for adopted children and ultimately led her to graduate school where she continued her focus to her dream of working in the adoption field. Stephanie earned a Master of Social Work degree from the University of Denver in 2001. Over the past 15 years, Stephanie has worked as a pregnancy counselor and as an adoptive parent counselor for foster care, international adoption and domestic adoption, writing hundreds of home studies for families, and helping build their forever families. Stephanie is married and has three boys ages 12, 9, and 5. Together with her family she enjoys riding bike, playing games, watching her three sons compete in their various sporting and musical activities and go on vacations.
Christy Ikeler, is our Executive Director and Birth Parent Director. Christy has been with Adoption Choices Team for 18 years, since opening the doors in 2002! Christy has a true passion for what she does and her true love is working with and helping each birth parent. Whether she is up all night on the phone talking with them, taking them to doctors appointments, out for their favorite treat, providing counseling or at the hospital during labor and delivery, Christy is very involved every step of the way. She has a contagious laugh and a spunky personality that our birth moms all can bond with and relate to. As an adoptive parent herself, adoption holds a very special place in her heart and she can relate on every level with both birth parents and adoptive parents. In her free time Christy loves spending time with her daughter, gardening, baking and taking vacations with her family. Christy is an excellent leader for our team at Adoption Choices and is truly one of a kind!! As Executive Director, Christy spends time with the staff, birth parents and adoptive families in order to ensure that the agency is running smoothly. She has placed a huge emphasis on community outreach and programs for birth parents. Christy loves the opportunity to lead the agency into a brighter future.
Ms. Mackenzie has built a successful counseling career over the past 20 years, supporting mothers and families, people of all ages and genders, students, community professionals and fellow clinicians. Liv values a diverse professional focus, including the entrepreneurial life of a sole proprietor, the evaluative process of certifying foster/adoptive homes, the insightful and mindful one-on-one one work with enthusiastic clients, and serving as an advocate for underserved populations. Liv is a Licensed Professional Counselor and holds a BA in Pre-Law and Economics from American University, an MA in Counseling from Adams University and a certificate in Human Resource Management from Villanova University. Away from work you will find Liv spending time in nature, biking to the farmer’s market and adventuring with her family.
Catherine A. Madsen, joined the Adoption Choices family as legal counsel in 2013. Catherine is responsible for providing legal guidance to the Agency, training and updating staff on developments in adoption law and legislation, and program development. Catherine
Virginia Frank is an adoption attorney accredited since 1991 with the American Academy of Adoption Attorneys. Ms. Frank is a leader in the field of private adoption and has completed over 4,000 adoptions in her career. Ms. Frank has a law degree from Oklahoma City University and a BA in both Political Science and Communications from the University of Oklahoma.
Cassidie has been with Adoption Choices since 2015, she has her bachelors in Interdisciplinary Affairs with concentrations in both Sociology and Business Management. Cassidie has additional training in Victim Advocacy, foster care and has been working in women’s services for over 10 years. Cassidie has always had a heart for adoption and it was her career dream to work in adoption. She started off doing volunteer work for advocacy programs, adoption organizations and worked in High Risk Maternal Fetal Medicine through the University of Colorado Hospital and Children’s Hospital of Colorado. Cassidie is also blessed to have personally experienced an adoption of her own in 2012, completing her family of five! Cassidie loves what she does as a case worker from initial phone calls, meetings, doctor appointments, interaction with the adoptive families to delivery and counseling. Cassidie has a passion for those in need and strives to help make a difference in the lives of the people she meets. She is a firm believer in being kind, compassionate and open minded in all situations. “Unless you’ve walked in their shoes, there’s no place for judgment. A kind word or compliment can go a long way!” The bittersweet moments in adoption reminds Cassidie each and every time, why she loves what she does!