5 Fears Colorado Birth Mothers Have about Open Adoption and Why You Shouldn’t Worry

By Lindsay Parkoo

Open adoption offers some great opportunities for you as a birth mother. You might not feel ready to raise a child, but that doesn’t mean you can’t build a relationship. Open adoptions allow you to do that and build a bond with your child and their parents. That relationship can look however you want as well. However, many birth mothers have valid fears when it comes to having an open adoption. They might be afraid of the emotional pain they’ll feel or complications with the family. Your Colorado adoption agency can help you understand those fears and more. 

At Adoption Choices of Colorado, we hear those open adoption fears and understand where they come from. We also have the resources to help you overcome them. If you want a chance to be close to your child, you should be able to do so with confidence. So, when you contact adoption agencies in Colorado, know that we’ll help you gain that confidence. 

5 Fears Birth Mothers Have about Open Adoption

1. What if my child doesn’t want to meet me?

Many birth mothers might be afraid that their children won’t want a relationship with them. They worry that their child will resent them for choosing adoption. While that is a reasonable fear, it shouldn’t stop you from pursuing a bond with your child. You might be pleasantly surprised to find that they want to get to know you. If you build a strong bond with the parents, there’s a good chance your child will want to follow suit. There’s no guarantee of knowing how your child will feel; adoption is complicated. However, it’s generally a good idea to put your best foot forward and be patient with your child. 

2. What if the adoptive parents don’t want a relationship with me? 

This fear is a very understandable one. You might be afraid that the adoptive parents start to pull away. Birth mothers might worry about how they get along with the family when they’re with the child. The good thing is, in your adoption plan, you get to choose the family in an open adoption. Along with that, you get the chance to get to know them before your baby gets placed. That gives you time to build a bond and solidify your relationship once your child goes with them. 

3. What if I can’t emotionally move on? 

Going through the adoption process can be a lot for birth mothers. It can be emotionally painful to endure. Choosing adoption is an act of love for your child, and you might be worried about how you’ll recover. In these cases, adoption agencies in Colorado can provide resources like therapy. Adoption-focused therapy can help you understand these emotions while you’re connecting with your child. With that, connecting with your child might even ease the grief you may feel. 

4. Will I be expected to raise my child if I keep contact?

Some birth mothers worry that they’ll be expected to take care of their children if they connect with them. That might be a reason a birth mother wouldn’t be as open. Remember though, no matter how close you are with your child, you still don’t have parental rights. When you choose adoption during your unplanned pregnancy, you absolve yourself of parenting responsibilities. So, if you have this fear, you can avoid it by setting strict boundaries with the adoptive family. Let them know what you can give from the beginning. No matter what, communication is key to knowing where you both stand.  

5. What if my baby isn’t loved by their adopted family?

This might be one of the bigger fears of birth mothers. You worry that the adoptive parents won’t love your child as much as you do. Maybe you’re worried they will feel emotionally neglected without you. There are ways to remedy this fear. Adoption agencies in Colorado already have programs like home studies to make sure this isn’t the case. One part of the adoption process is a home study, where prospective parents are screened. They get checked by specialists to ensure they and their home are suitable for raising a child. Along with that safety measure, you can connect with the family to make sure they’re right for your baby. 

Know More about Open Adoption with Adoption Choices of Colorado

Each type of adoption works for certain individuals. Along with learning how to give your baby up for adoption, learn which type of adoption works for you. Open adoption might open you up to emotional healing and gaining a family. So, don’t let your fears keep you from missing out on that. Contact Adoption Choices of Colorado by searching “adoption Colorado Springs” and experience our expertise. 

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