Colorado Adoption When the Birth Father is Unknown or Unsupportive
By Jonathan Tick
A question may come up when a birth mother seeks Private Adoption in Colorado. Who is the birth father? The birth father is what our adoption specialists in Adoption Choices of Colorado call the child’s biological father. And their presence or lack thereof can have notable effects on your CO adoption. So, what can a birth mother do? Approaching the situation first involves determining whether or not you know the birth father. This vital piece of information will impact how your adoption at our colorado adoption agencies will go.
If you need adoption help now, please call or text us at 303-670-4673 (HOPE) or visit us at Adoption Choices of Colorado.
If the Birth Father is Unsupportive
Situations where the birth father is unsupportive usually have the birth mother know who the child’s father is. And an unsupportive birth father is also aware that their child has been put up for adoption. The result of these two factors results in a rocky situation that typically puts the adoption on hold, where the adoption may turn into a legal battle over deciding what will happen to the child when they’re born.
An unsupportive birth father may decide that they want to take care of the child himself rather than opt for the choice of placing the baby up for adoption and giving away his chance at fatherhood. To argue for custody of the child, he’ll need to show that he can take care of the child both physically and financially as well as show prove his ability to take care of the child alone. The journey for a Colorado birth father to gain custody of the child can be very long. Any missteps such as failing to meet a basic standard for the child to live in may terminate his ability to gain custody.
In situations like these, the adoption can then proceed as normal. If not, a long, legal battle between the two birth parents may ensue. Seek legal counsel if you feel that this may be the case. Talk to your adoption specialist if you feel you made need further help to get your adoption plan back on track.
An alternative to fighting in court can be discussing your decision for adoption. Talking out your reasons and feelings for choosing adoption may sway him to your side. And get him thinking about the positives for your baby in the long run. Adoption is sometimes seen as a bad thing, and the birth father may feel that way too. By educating him on the benefits of CO adoption, there’s a chance he may be willing to relinquish his parental rights. Ensuring that the adoption process can go smoothly now that he’s supporting the decision too.
If the Birth Father is Unknown or Absent
Absent or unknown birth fathers are generally easier than their unsupportive counterparts. Since the birth father is unknown, there are no records of them, and therefore can’t be identified. Because nobody can claim themselves as the child’s father, there’s no need to have them sign over their parental rights alongside the birth mother. Since the birth father likely has no idea that they either have a child or that the birth mother is going through private adoption in Colorado. The adoption process can then proceed as normal. With the mother continuing their adoption plan as normal until the day it’s time to relinquish their parental rights.
The situation regarding unknown or absent birth fathers only changes if the father is known. If he isn’t interested in being involved with the child, then the adoption can proceed as normal. If he is interested, however, then his case will become that of an unsupportive birth father. And the CO adoption may have to involve legal proceedings to sort out any issues between the two birth parents.
So What Can a Birth Mother Do?
A birth mother should first and foremost talk to their adoption specialist about the birth father’s status. Every birth mother’s adoption plan is different. Same with the needs and services required to make your unplanned pregnancy as pleasant as possible. Adoption Choices of Colorado will always give their full support to the birth mother. So that even if an unsupportive birth father goes against your choices, you can fall back on us to support you instead.
If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy and want to learn more about your adoption options, contact Adoption Choices of Colorado by email, phone, or text: Email Us, Text us: 720-371-1099, Call us: 303-670-4673 (HOPE). If you are hoping to adopt, please contact us here.
Stephanie joined the Adoption Choices family in 2014 as the Child Placement Supervisor. Her love for adoption began in first grade when she made friends with twins adopted from Vietnam. Her heart grew strong over the years for adopted children and ultimately led her to graduate school where she continued her focus to her dream of working in the adoption field. Stephanie earned a Master of Social Work degree from the University of Denver in 2001. Over the past 15 years, Stephanie has worked as a pregnancy counselor and as an adoptive parent counselor for foster care, international adoption and domestic adoption, writing hundreds of home studies for families, and helping build their forever families. Stephanie is married and has three boys ages 12, 9, and 5. Together with her family she enjoys riding bike, playing games, watching her three sons compete in their various sporting and musical activities and go on vacations.
Christy Ikeler, is our Executive Director and Birth Parent Director. Christy has been with Adoption Choices Team for 18 years, since opening the doors in 2002! Christy has a true passion for what she does and her true love is working with and helping each birth parent. Whether she is up all night on the phone talking with them, taking them to doctors appointments, out for their favorite treat, providing counseling or at the hospital during labor and delivery, Christy is very involved every step of the way. She has a contagious laugh and a spunky personality that our birth moms all can bond with and relate to. As an adoptive parent herself, adoption holds a very special place in her heart and she can relate on every level with both birth parents and adoptive parents. In her free time Christy loves spending time with her daughter, gardening, baking and taking vacations with her family. Christy is an excellent leader for our team at Adoption Choices and is truly one of a kind!! As Executive Director, Christy spends time with the staff, birth parents and adoptive families in order to ensure that the agency is running smoothly. She has placed a huge emphasis on community outreach and programs for birth parents. Christy loves the opportunity to lead the agency into a brighter future.
Ms. Mackenzie has built a successful counseling career over the past 20 years, supporting mothers and families, people of all ages and genders, students, community professionals and fellow clinicians. Liv values a diverse professional focus, including the entrepreneurial life of a sole proprietor, the evaluative process of certifying foster/adoptive homes, the insightful and mindful one-on-one one work with enthusiastic clients, and serving as an advocate for underserved populations. Liv is a Licensed Professional Counselor and holds a BA in Pre-Law and Economics from American University, an MA in Counseling from Adams University and a certificate in Human Resource Management from Villanova University. Away from work you will find Liv spending time in nature, biking to the farmer’s market and adventuring with her family.
Catherine A. Madsen, joined the Adoption Choices family as legal counsel in 2013. Catherine is responsible for providing legal guidance to the Agency, training and updating staff on developments in adoption law and legislation, and program development. Catherine
Virginia Frank is an adoption attorney accredited since 1991 with the American Academy of Adoption Attorneys. Ms. Frank is a leader in the field of private adoption and has completed over 4,000 adoptions in her career. Ms. Frank has a law degree from Oklahoma City University and a BA in both Political Science and Communications from the University of Oklahoma.
Cassidie has been with Adoption Choices since 2015, she has her bachelors in Interdisciplinary Affairs with concentrations in both Sociology and Business Management. Cassidie has additional training in Victim Advocacy, foster care and has been working in women’s services for over 10 years. Cassidie has always had a heart for adoption and it was her career dream to work in adoption. She started off doing volunteer work for advocacy programs, adoption organizations and worked in High Risk Maternal Fetal Medicine through the University of Colorado Hospital and Children’s Hospital of Colorado. Cassidie is also blessed to have personally experienced an adoption of her own in 2012, completing her family of five! Cassidie loves what she does as a case worker from initial phone calls, meetings, doctor appointments, interaction with the adoptive families to delivery and counseling. Cassidie has a passion for those in need and strives to help make a difference in the lives of the people she meets. She is a firm believer in being kind, compassionate and open minded in all situations. “Unless you’ve walked in their shoes, there’s no place for judgment. A kind word or compliment can go a long way!” The bittersweet moments in adoption reminds Cassidie each and every time, why she loves what she does!